not an invitation to RAPE ME

by **TroubleFunk** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 5:22 pm

This is a most vexing series of exchanges!

by **sunny** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 5:48 pm

It doesn't condone the acts of men who think that this is ok, but it's a two-way street. Women can't go around dressed like Paris Hilton skank-clones and not expect men to be sexually aroused and do things that they normally wouldn't do. And men can't go around and letting their hormones do the thinking. _______________________________________________ So, if women don't dress "responsibly", men don't have to ACT responsibly?

by **Sarutama** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 5:55 pm

He said, quite clearly, that <blockquote>Quote:<hr> It doesn't condone the acts of men who think that this is ok<hr></blockquote> So its pretty clear that he's not saying men are free to rape at will if women dress provactively. BUT, women also have to take some responsibilty for their own safety. If I walk through a dark alley at night with a $100 bill hanging out of my pocket there's a good chance I'll get robbed. If you walk around a world full of rapists with your vagina hanging out, there's a good chance you could get raped.

by **TroubleFunk** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 5:55 pm

What, exactly, makes Paris Hilton a "skank"? Her clothes are expensive and look pretty good on her (usually). This "modesty" you speak of, cyberchrist - it's a construct. And not a positive one either. I don't want to be beaten for wearing punk clothes, or a pink triangle, or any other garb, and I don't want to be told what to do. I can comport myself just fine regardless of what those around me are wearing, and I can't believe you have so little faith in others. Go back to the title of this thread and think about it, because what you're saying is just plain fucking stupid.

by **Col Quisp** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 6:39 pm

<blockquote>Quote:<hr>If I walk through a dark alley at night with a $100 bill hanging out of my pocket there's a good chance I'll get robbed. If you walk around a world full of rapists with your vagina hanging out, there's a good chance you could get raped.<hr></blockquote> That has got to be the stupidest thing I've ever read here.

by **TroubleFunk** » Thu Apr 20, 2006 6:40 pm

"That has got to be the stupidest thing I've ever read here." Agreed.

by **anotherdrew** » Fri Apr 21, 2006 12:42 am

Sarutama, I'm going to assume that's was just very poorly worded and a bit ill concieved. speaking of taking responsibility, you know there are some very nasty anti-rape devices for sale in south africa, tho they may have been forced off the market by now. I won't go into it but think about a needle where you least expected it, and severe tire damage strips, and a dose of knockout juice from the needle. remember, people can dress however they want, doing so doesn't force anyone to do anything.

by **blanc** » Fri Apr 21, 2006 4:15 am

most self defence devices are potentialy dangerous to the victim, when, as is usual, the victim is smaller, weaker and less attuned to fighting, and not expecting attack. (mention this, though this may be another of your jokes AD) that said, I have been recommended one non lethal defence device by an old frail man who used it successfully on would be muggers - fires blinding substance from a distance - and have once used martial art successfully against agressor - but now I think of it, it was in the era of mini skirts , and a funny aside from this dressing debate is the thought that had I been wearing the maxi which came into fashion a year later (much more modest!) I'd have been too hobbled to throw him. Agressor BTW was wearing a long hooded velvet cloak and bell bottoms so I thought from a distance he was a harmless hippy. It was broad daylight, on a pathway normally frequented by the bowler hat brigade, who so far managed to contain any lustful impulses aroused by immodestly dressed young women as to never take their heads out of the financial times.

by **Chiaroscuro** » Fri Apr 21, 2006 4:53 am

see article here Anti-rape condom aims to stop sexual assaults South African inventor creates 'rapex' device fitted with hooks and barbs <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9145415">www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9145415</a> KLEINMOND, South Africa - A South African inventor unveiled a new anti-rape female condom on Wednesday that hooks onto an attacker’s penis and aims to cut one of the highest rates of sexual assault in the world. “Nothing has ever been done to help a woman so that she does not get raped and I thought it was high time,” Sonette Ehlers, 57, said of the "rapex," a device worn like a tampon that has sparked controversy in a country used to daily reports of violent crime.

by **Sarutama** » Fri Apr 21, 2006 11:11 am

<blockquote>Quote:<hr>Sarutama, I'm going to assume that's was just very poorly worded and a bit ill concieved. speaking of taking responsibility, you know there are some very nasty anti-rape devices for sale in south africa, tho they may have been forced off the market by now. I won't go into it but think about a needle where you least expected it, and severe tire damage strips, and a dose of knockout juice from the needle.<hr></blockquote> I think those anti rape devices are brilliant. There are some that don't do the knock out juice, they just latch on like fish hooks and the scumbag rapist has to go to the hospital and to get them removed. Once the doctor see's this thing attached to the guy, they call the cops. My point is this. In a perfect, ideal world everything that was said here would be true. Of course women should be able to wear whatever they want and act however the want without fear of being raped & without the fear of some asshole defense attorney dragging her name through the mud and saying she was asking for it because her skirt was too short. However, I think everyone here can attest to the fact that the real world is far from ideal. In the real world men (not all men mind you, but some percentage of men) have proven for millenia that they are incapable of controling themselves. That they are animals at the most base, and act on a simple "Want, take , have" mentality. Want a woman, take a woman, have a woman. This in no way justifies or excuses their behavior. I for one am a proponent of life in prison for all sex offenders (only because I am opposed to the death penalty in all cases). It also does not mean that women are at all to blame for being raped. The blame lies squarely on the shoulder of the animal who raped them. That being said, in the real world all people (in this particular case women) have to take responsibilty for their own safety. There are certain things that women can do to try and avoid being raped. Not walking through dark alleys alone is one. Not going to partys full of drunken frat guys dressed like a prostitute and leaving your drink unattended is another. To pretend otherwise is niave, and more to the point, dangerous.

by **anotherdrew** » Fri Apr 21, 2006 12:42 pm

it might be worth pointing out that men who cross-dress as women are all too often taking their lives in their hands going out on the street. It's one of the most common types of "gay-bashing" (and the victim might not even be gay of course), and all too often leads to being beaten all the way to death. Women don't commit these types of crimes hardly at all, if ever. The question is what is to be done with men who can not be socialised to behave in an acceptable manner consistently and can they be identified BEFORE they hurt someone? Edited by: <A HREF=http://p216.ezboard.com/brigorousintuition.showUserPublicProfile?gid=anotherdrew>anotherdrew</A> at: 4/21/06 10:43 am

by **nashvillebrook** » Sat Apr 22, 2006 1:15 pm

does anyone have any thoughts on this post vis a vis ritualistic abuse?

by **sunny** » Sat Apr 22, 2006 1:22 pm

nashvillebrook, only that rape is about power and so is RA. In my job, I come across a rape victim at least once a month, and I'm talking about women who have been raped by their husbands or live-in lovers. These men could have consensual sex with their partners just about anytime they wanted. What else but power issues could explain why abusers would rape a person who would give them sex if it was properly solicited?

by **blanc** » Sat Apr 22, 2006 4:36 pm

ra perpetrators use rape to break down, demean and control The post began around the question of whether some behaviours/apparel were an invitation to rape, and the attempt to disabuse this notion. Actually no-one invites rape - obviously, an invitation to rape is a contradiction in terms. RA victims are usually attacked from a very young age. although the abusers use many strategies to inculcate the idea in the victim that he/she desrves 'it' or 'wanted' it, this is plainly lies, just another part of the control strategy. When people blame victims, of either sex and any age, even when qualifying that blame, they serve the rapist's purpose, become in some small way, at one with the crime. When the discussion centred around clothing, I considered posting a vomit making quote, in which a paedophile, unaware that he was being taped by police, describes the shorts worn by a nine year old whom he raped in terms some others reserve for clothing they think is sluttish and 'asking for it' and then, later in the tape, discusses what he will do to a baby in nappies (diapers) what else can be said? those who must have power over others and express that desire through violence, are usually physical and moral cowards, who crawl under stones to commit and hide their crimes. I wish that the fear of being wrongly accused, or, even more improbably, losing control of a situation in which he is always the stronger, did not lead so many to create excuses and get outs for rapists. Adult survivors of ra, habitually get dubbed as fantasists, attention seekers or crazies. anything but admit it goes on and investigate. most rapes go unpunished. Rape affects more than the immediate victim. Husbands, fathers, lovers, children suffer too.

by **Chiaroscuro** » Sun Apr 23, 2006 2:26 am

That perps only make attacks where they know there no one willing to stop them shows they DO have self control over their sexual activities. Do rapists grab women in postage stamp thong bikini sunning on the beach? Do they leap upon the girls in pushup bras, tank tops, and low cut jeans shopping until they drop at the local mall? Does the date rapist attack their date in the resturant? No they wait until the target is secluded or around others who don't give a damn what they perp will do with the victim. They have the self control. They simply choose to not exercise it. This is why I cut no slack for any person who sexually abuses another. While it behoves all people to take resonable precausions it is no guaretee one won't be raped. Women could dress like nuns, stick to low crime areas, lock their doors, and the rest but women like that get raped every damned day by husbands, boyfriends, and trusted aquaintances. Most assults reported are by those males known to the victim not strangers. This means even more than avoiding crime areas, dressing in a victorian fashion, and the rest women should not work with men, date or marry to cut their risk of assult.

not an invitation to RAPE ME

This is...

WTF?

Re: WTF?

unbelievable

Re: unbelievable

...

good grief

devices

There really are anti-rape devices

Re: There really are anti-rape devices

anothing thinking point

sex and violence -- power and hate

Re: sex and violence -- power and hate

ra

re: Self Control

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