OP ED wrote:maybe they were dealers?
i was tripping at an amusement park one day and was "followed" by a dodgy guy in a suit for several hours. when he finally cornered me he tried to sell me weed. was all he wanted. he could just tell i was already on drugs and assumed i'd be good business or whatever.
Followed you for a couple of hours!!!
The main drag of Nimbin is about 400 metres long.
I'll bet the first time you walked along it at least 10 people would ask you if you wanted to buy weed, two or three if you wanted other drugs.
First paranoia ... first time I ever went to school maybe, or preschool. Tho I can't really rememebr it. It didn't last tho, if anything it was over stuff I had forgotten to do or grab before we went somewhere. Like in the car after you've left home "Oh shit did I leave the stove on" but for a young child.
When I was 10 or 11 years old tho I used to get followed, in Hobart. I never realised. One day my parents did it, and picked me up in the car. They then proceded to tell me not to walk down the street alone, always use safe houses or shop where we knew people if I was walking down the road, or travel ina group of friends.
About 3 weeks later my father left Tassie in a big hurry from a small airfield about 250 km away from Hobart, the other end of the island actually, after a phone call from the state Attorney General, saying leave now, and not from the major airports where people are waiting for you.
Funnily enough even that didn't turn me paranoid. I think I was too clueless.
Dad went to melbourne, and cos he was the one the people in Tassie wanted gone, that was the end of our troubles. WE went the following year, after he'd settled in a bit, and we had sorted out whatever we needed to. My mother was from Tassie, and with Dad who was the "problem" out of the way apparantly we were safe. I certainly wasn't being followed any more.
After I moved to melbourne I started to get paranoia, I was just starting my teenage years by then. maybe it was hormones.
Once I started choofing I'd get it heaps, you know weed paranoia, where everyone is looking at you and thinking about you. That was what I'd call paranoia, tho the "left the stove on" fear is definitley its own form of it.
To deal with this I'd get really stoned then travel at peak hour on melbourne public transport. Looking like a freak. That got me over my paranoia. I no longer gave a fuck what people thought.
However real paranoia was still there. I'm driving through melbourne with half a pound of weed - "why is that car following me? It just turned off, but why did that other car turn on to the road ten seconds later?
"They must be cops working together."
To get over that sort of paranoia these days, I would imagine my neurons in my brain, and atch the thought that was making me paranoid, then visualise travelling back along those neurons for several hundred branchings, and take another nerve pathway.
If the paranoia comes back, then its actually me being slihtly pre cog - so I repeat the process, if it doesn't its just paranoia. If it comes back after a second attempt at reprograming I take the paranoia s a warning. IT actaully seems to work, tho its only happened twice in about 10 years.
Of course now that I don't deal and only grow a plant or two for purrso, alot of that pointless paranoia is completely non existant. I haven't had it for years and don't miss it. It is one of the reasons I don't get back into growing heavily when the work dries up.
BTW There is something trippy about hiding in a closet or a cave between the hot water system and the basement, or where ever it is you hide as a kid. I think its a really important thing to do as a child.
by Col. Quisp » Sat Feb 28, 2009 10:09 pm 
