The books I misplace

[Jeff]

All these shelves and stacks of books, and I want only the ones I can't find.

Like, I took William Irwin Thompson's The Time Falling Bodies Take to Light to breakfast today, and I know I brought it home, but what the hell happened to it between the front door and the kitchen I don't know.

[norton ash]

It's under something.

[Perelandra]

Look in the drawer under the oven. My keys were there for a few months recently.

[brainpanhandler]

Most of my books are actually on my bookshelf at the moment. The last time it was organized was about 3 years ago. There is only the vestigial remnant of order left as books have been returned in cycles and crammed into whatever space was available. I have to cock my head all over the place to read the spines. I don't even know what books are missing, but I'm sure there are some that have escaped over the years. I try to forget books that were loaned out and never returned.

I know it's a horrible cliche, but what I really want to know is where the hell are my missing socks? I swear to god I don't understand where they go. I actually inspect the inside of the washer and dryer whenever I remove a load that has socks in it to make sure that everything is out and somehow I still lose socks. I keep all the orphans thinking that someday their mates will show up. Sometimes they have although I have not had a successful reunion in awhile. Fucking socks. And they're expensive socks too. Socks is one of those things like cushy toilet paper or real vanilla extract that I think it's worth spending the extra money on. Get good socks.

[Pele'sDaughter]

I did have that sock problem, but I got some zippered mesh bags to wash them and and haven't lost one since. Well, the dog's eaten a few, but that's a different sort of disappearance.

[Cordelia]

My dogs steal books and socks. If something is missing, I always ask them first. The Mastiff, who's tall enough to reach the bookshelves is usually guilty of taking books (he chewed up a vintage copy of 'Leo, The Little St. Bernard', that belonged to my ex, who still hasn't been back to pick up his belongings. I was able to get the cover, with teeth marks, away from him, as evidence. I left a copy of Anais Nin's 'A Spy In The House Of Love' visible for when he eventually picks up his belongings, so that he'll know I'm on to him, but now that's missing too.)

Lost socks are a bigger mystery. Jerry Seinfeld had a great stand-up skit on lost socks, but I can't find it.

This one's kind of cute; someone's student film project:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Zr-5k6N-3k

[smiths]

i just misplaced 4 hours work on a poster i had completed on the computer,

i had to do a second poster at the same dimensions and i had used the first as a template, but i saved over it, and the first one is gone, and i feel deflated and pissed off

[AlicetheKurious]

One of my kids lost a laptop computer today. I told him not to bring it to school, but he said he really needed it to do work. I knew the real reason was because he liked the attention from the other kids, who sucked up to him so he'd let them play on it. He left it in his geography class when he had to go to English and when he came back, it was gone. He searched the school and notified the principal and security, but they found no trace of it. He's devastated by the loss and tortured by guilt. During dinner, as the food got cold on his plate, he said mournfully, "If God wants to give me one more chance I swear I'll never take it out of the house again." Then he sighed and said, "But maybe God wants to teach me a lesson. Well, I've learned it forever, so He might as well let me have the computer back." He added that it wasn't even worth it. The girl who'd always been mean to him and who had started acting nice when he brought the computer the first few times, had gone back to being mean anyway, even before he lost the computer.