you know you're a conspiracy theorist when...

[operator kos]

An opportunity for us to poke some fun at ourselves. Proper formatting is "You know you're a conspiracy theorist when..." or "If XYZ, you might be a conspiracy theorist." Bonus points for real-life examples.

"You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you've been successfully putting on pounds to prepare for the apocalypse, but to your dismay you realize that your bullet proof vest no longer fits."

[Stephen Morgan]

...you start wondering who's telling people not respond to this thread.

[Jeff]

...you're accused of being a conspirator.

[norton ash]

You don't respond to a conspiracy joke thread because the very notion somehow pisses you off too much to see it as an opportunity to make a joke.

[operator kos]

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when being singled out for a random search at the airport is a validating experience for you. (guilty)

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you've become accustomed being followed in public by men in black with telephoto lens cameras. (happened to me when Hillary Clinton was in town)

[Sweejak]

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you're denied entry into Canada.

[Simulist]

…when you're convinced that person staring at you in the mirror is plotting something.

[DoYouEverWonder]

when you have a 1000+ posts on Rigorous Intuition.

[Sweejak]

when you want to join a militia and they figure you'd be best used as a bomb.

[operator kos]

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you trust your psilocybin-induced visions more than the nightly news.

[Nordic]

when you call AT&T to report a problem with your cell phone and they tell you "but you already called that in".

(happened to me)

[thatsmystory]

When your first thought upon receiving someone's business card is "Nice legend."

[Searcher08]

When you joke about the Irish ruling the planet... and then start finding finding lots of evidence for it

[Nordic]

When you're making a lot of noise on the Boycott BP Facebook page, then Facebook suddenly eliminates the page, and the next day your internet starts acting REALLY REALLY weird .......

[beeline]

.

Opening the mailbox to find all the letters in it have already been opened, and, presumably, read.