rigorousintuition.ca

An opportunity for us to poke some fun at ourselves. Proper formatting is "You know you're a conspiracy theorist when..." or "If XYZ, you might be a conspiracy theorist." Bonus points for real-life examples.

"You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you've been successfully putting on pounds to prepare for the apocalypse, but to your dismay you realize that your bullet proof vest no longer fits."

...you start wondering who's telling people not respond to this thread.

...you're accused of being a conspirator.

You don't respond to a conspiracy joke thread because the very notion somehow pisses you off too much to see it as an opportunity to make a joke.

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when being singled out for a random search at the airport is a validating experience for you. (guilty)

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you've become accustomed being followed in public by men in black with telephoto lens cameras. (happened to me when Hillary Clinton was in town)

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you're denied entry into Canada.

…when you're convinced that person staring at you in the mirror is plotting something.

when you have a 1000+ posts on Rigorous Intuition.

when you want to join a militia and they figure you'd be best used as a bomb.

You know you're a conspiracy theorist when you trust your psilocybin-induced visions more than the nightly news.

when you call AT&T to report a problem with your cell phone and they tell you "but you already called that in".

(happened to me)

When your first thought upon receiving someone's business card is "Nice legend."

When you joke about the Irish ruling the planet... and then start finding finding lots of evidence for it

When you're making a lot of noise on the Boycott BP Facebook page, then Facebook suddenly eliminates the page, and the next day your internet starts acting REALLY REALLY weird .......

.

Opening the mailbox to find all the letters in it have already been opened, and, presumably, read.