Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby Grizzly » Wed Jul 10, 2019 5:25 pm

Don't kid yourselves, those children very well will be prone to growing up to be the same or worse psycopath's their parents and or caregivers are... thus repeats the cycle.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby minime » Wed Jul 10, 2019 5:44 pm

Grizzly » Wed Jul 10, 2019 4:25 pm wrote:Don't kid yourselves, those children very well will be prone to growing up to be the same or worse psycopath's their parents and or caregivers are... thus repeats the cycle.


More's the pity.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby Cordelia » Thu Jul 11, 2019 10:51 am

minime » Wed Jul 10, 2019 2:26 pm wrote:Oh Cordelia, I was going to say the same thing.

"Forever and ever..."

Partly it's the creepy dresses. But mainly it's the look in their eyes.

And the mother. Jesus
.


Yes, and The Mother--Yikes!


Wonder who's the other creepy man beside(s) Pence and the other little girl (holding hands ‘twins’ style).

Image

Grizzly » Wed Jul 10, 2019 4:25 pm wrote:Don't kid yourselves, those children very well will be prone to growing up to be the same or worse psycopath's their parents and or caregivers are... thus repeats the cycle.


Maybe, or maybe they'll grow to be 'normally' dysfunctional adults--alcoholics, addicts to medication, consumerism, social media, themselves--or spend years in therapy to overcome PTSD, heal from their family-of-origin, or go postal or do a Lizzy Borden, etc... :shrug:

If every picture tells a story, that family's speaks volumes and someone should have called CPS on their behalf back in 2017. (There should be a DSM category for family members of elected officials, cabinet members, etc...and their entourages who are uprooted from home, family and friends to move and be sucked into the soulless quicksands of political Washington DC environs.)
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby Elvis » Fri Jul 12, 2019 4:57 am

Yeah who's the guy with the blue necktie? He looks guilty.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby RocketMan » Fri Jul 12, 2019 7:31 am

Everyone is noticing the twins' Shining aura, but look at the mom, a dead ringer for Shelley Duvall!

The kids look perfectly adorable in the latest photo, the signing picture was not flattering to anyone involved. But yeah, the empty look in the eyes is worrying.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby Iamwhomiam » Fri Jul 12, 2019 11:57 am

The guy in the blue tie is supposedly Acosta's father. (Perhaps once a pig in a bay?) However, I think you'll have to ask Epstein to learn who the girl with the brown hair is.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby minime » Fri Jul 12, 2019 12:46 pm

Iamwhomiam » Fri Jul 12, 2019 10:57 am wrote:The guy in the blue tie is supposedly Acosta's father. (Perhaps once a pig in a bay?) However, I think you'll have to ask Epstein to learn who the girl with the brown hair is.


Acosta's father is a Cuban immigrant, came across at age 11 as a refugee just before the Cuban missile crisis, and works in a cell phone store. His mother is, or was, employed as a paralegal.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Shining but don't

Postby Cordelia » Fri Jul 12, 2019 1:49 pm

minime » Fri Jul 12, 2019 11:46 am wrote:
Iamwhomiam » Fri Jul 12, 2019 10:57 am wrote:The guy in the blue tie is supposedly Acosta's father. (Perhaps once a pig in a bay?) However, I think you'll have to ask Epstein to learn who the girl with the brown hair is.


Acosta's father is a Cuban immigrant, came across at age 11 as a refugee just before the Cuban missile crisis, and works in a cell phone store. His mother is, or was, employed as a paralegal.


I assumed he was a Capitol Hill official/functionary and shouldn't have labeled him as creepy.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby Iamwhomiam » Sat Jul 13, 2019 9:51 am

minime » Fri Jul 12, 2019 12:46 pm wrote:
Iamwhomiam » Fri Jul 12, 2019 10:57 am wrote:The guy in the blue tie is supposedly Acosta's father. (Perhaps once a pig in a bay?) However, I think you'll have to ask Epstein to learn who the girl with the brown hair is.


Acosta's father is a Cuban immigrant, came across at age 11 as a refugee just before the Cuban missile crisis, and works in a cell phone store. His mother is, or was, employed as a paralegal.


Thanks, minime. I knew his dad had been a Cuban refugee, but forgot how old I was and how young Acosta Jr was!
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby streeb » Wed Jul 17, 2019 5:36 pm

Tupac-Obsessed Iowa Public Servant Resigns In Mystery

The Iowa Department for Human Services provides services to the poor, children, senior citizens, and people with mental illness, addictions, or disabilities. Jerry Foxhoven, a retired law professor, was appointed to head up the agency in 2017, and until he was ousted last month, he added another directive to that long list: spreading the good word of Tupac Shakur.

According to the Associated Press, the 66-year-old public servant held weekly “Tupac Fridays” listening sessions in the DHS office, celebrated his 65th birthday with cookies that depicted Tupac’s face and the phrase “Thug life,” and shared some 350 pages’ worth of emails to colleagues invoking the late rapper and his lyrics...


https://theconcourse.deadspin.com/tupac-obsessed-iowa-public-servant-resigns-in-mystery-1836457108
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby Cordelia » Tue Jul 23, 2019 12:02 pm

Man crashes van with $140 million worth of meth into parked police cars in ‘easiest drug bust’ ever, police say

July 23 at 9:31 AM

The Colombian man reportedly caught smuggling cocaine under a badly fitting toupee may have been outdone.

On Monday local time, a man from a suburb of Sydney led police to the estimated $140 million of crystal methamphetamine in his van after crashing into two police cars, the New South Wales Police Force said.

The cars were parked — right in front of a police station.

Police say the white Toyota HiAce contained more than 270 kilograms — about 600 pounds — of the drug commonly known as “ice,” divided into 13 boxes each with 21 one-kilogram bags. The driver, identified by police as Simon Tu, 26, took off in the Toyota after the crash but was quickly tracked down and arrested.

“This would be one of the easiest drug busts the NSW Police force has ever made,” NSW Police Detective Chief Inspector Glyn Baker told media. “Incredible, absolutely incredible.”

MORE: https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/20 ... 1f5ecf64ec


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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby Elvis » Tue Jul 23, 2019 1:53 pm

July 22, 2019
The President of the United States of America:

PRESIDENT TRUMP: Well, thank you very much. It’s my great honor to have the very popular and, by the way, great athlete — one of the greatest — but very popular Prime Minister of Pakistan.

We have many things to discuss: military and terrorism and trade. And I think we’re going to spend a lot of time talking about trade because we do very little trade with Pakistan compared to what we could be doing and should be doing when our countries really get along perfectly. And I think we’re having that start. We’re going to have that start.

But there’s tremendous upside with respect to trade. One of the things we’re going to be discussing too is hostages; perhaps the polio vaccine, because Pakistan is one of the countries, and we’ll talk about that as to, you know, what your feeling is on that. But we have a situation in Pakistan where we want to talk about the polio, or the possible polio vaccine.

And I think we’re going to have great meetings. We’re going to be spending a long time together. We have our representatives meeting right after we’re finished. And we just came out, Mr. Prime Minister, with tremendous economic numbers for the United States — the best we’ve ever had. We’ve got the best economy we’ve ever had. And I think we can shift some of that over to Pakistan. We should be doing tremendous business together. So, I look forward to it.
...

I will say that we have a very good relationship with India. I know that your relationship is strained a little bit. Maybe a lot. But we will be talking about India; a very big part of our conversation today. And I think maybe if we can help intercede and do whatever we have to do. But I think it’s something that can be brought back together.

And we’ll also be talking about Afghanistan. We’ve reduced our number of troops there by quite a bit. We are continuing to reduce troops in Afghanistan. We’re working with Pakistan and others on getting an agreement signed, as you know. And we’ll see what happens.

But we will be talking about India and Afghanistan very much so.
...

I know all about Huawei. I know all about 5G. And we’re working on it, and we have companies that are now getting very, very strong in that department. And we’re going to have 5G. We’re going to have the best 5G in the world, just like we have everything else.

Our Silicone [sic] — Silicon Valley cannot be competed with. There’s nobody that can compete with Silicon Valley for the brainpower or for what we do.

And nobody was focused on 5G but now they are. And we have great companies going into 5G. Even if they don’t want to, a lot of them were very happy doing what they were doing. But now they’re going — at my request, they’re going into 5G. So we don’t need — we don’t need anything from anybody.
...

Our relationship with North Korea has been very good. We’ve really established a good relationship with Kim Jong Un. I have personally. There’s no rocket testing. There’s no missile testing. We’re getting our remains back.
...

Well, I think we’re going to have a great meeting today. I know that it’s an important meeting. I consider this a very important meeting because I think we haven’t met the potential of either country. I think the potential with Pakistan and likewise, the opposite way, I think we have not even come close to meeting it. There is tremendous potential between our country and Pakistan.

I think Pakistan is going to help us out to extricate ourselves. We’re like policemen. We’re not fighting the war. If we wanted to fight a war in Afghanistan and win it, I could win that war in a week. I just don’t want to kill 10 million people. Does that make sense to you? I don’t want to kill 10 million people.

I have plans on Afghanistan that, if I wanted to win that war, Afghanistan would be wiped off the face of the Earth. It would be gone. It would be over in — literally, in 10 days. And I don’t want to do — I don’t want to go that route.

So we’re working with Pakistan and others to extricate ourselves. Nor do we want to be policemen, because basically we’re policemen right now. And we’re not supposed to be policemen. We’ve been there — we’ve been there for 19 years, in Afghanistan. It’s ridiculous. And I think Pakistan helps us with that because we don’t want to stay as policemen. But if we wanted to, we could win that war. I have a plan that would win that war in a very short period of time. You understand that better than anybody.

PRIME MINISTER KHAN: Mm-hmm.
...

So we are going to — that’s right — we were paying $1.3 billion to Pakistan as aid, for many years. The problem was Pakistan — this is before you — Pakistan was not doing anything for us. They were really, I think, subversive. They were going against us. And this is something we’ll be ta- — I ended that about a year and a half ago, the $1.3 billion.

And I tell you what: To be honest, I think we have a better relationship with Pakistan right now than we did when we were paying that money. But all of that can come back, depending on what we work out.

We’re working out things that are very important. We have a very — I consider this very important. We’re working out things that are very, very important.
...

And Robert Mueller, I know he’s conflicted — he had a lot — there’s a lot of conflicts that he’s got, including the fact that his best friend is Comey. But he’s got conflicts with me, too. He’s got big conflicts with me. As you know, he wanted the job of the FBI Director. He didn’t get it. And we had a business relationship where I said, “No.” And I would say that he wasn’t happy. Then, all of a sudden, he gets this position. But you know what? He still ruled — and I respect him for it — he still ruled “no collusion, no obstruction.”

And this thing should’ve ended a long time ago. This has been going on for two and a half years. And we’re never going to allow this to happen to another President again because most of them wouldn’t be able to take it.

On top of everything else, we have the strongest economy. We were just discussing this with the Prime Minister. We have the strongest economy that the United States has ever had. We have the highest stock market. Yesterday, literally, the highest stock market we’ve ever had on Friday — Thursday.

We’ve broken the record, I think, 109 times for highest stock market. But on, I believe, Thursday of last week we hit the all-time highest in the history of our country.

Our country is doing phenomenally well. Unemployment is the lowest in 51 years, soon to be the lowest in history if it keeps going this way in a short period of time. Black, Hispanic, Asian unemployment — the lowest in history. Women — the lowest in 72 years.

Nobody has ever done what we’ve done. Nobody has done in two and a half years what we’ve done: the biggest tax cuts in history; the biggest regulation cuts in history. So many things for healthcare. We got rid of the individual mandate which was the worst part of Obamacare. Going to end up — if we end up winning the House back, we keep the presidency, we should keep the Senate. We should keep the presidency, I would think easy, when you have the strongest economy in the history of our country. And somebody is going to run against that particular President even though, in this case, it’s me. In theory, I have a big advantage. I don’t know. I’m going to have to ask you. But, in theory, I have a big advantage.
...

We’re putting our military back into a shape that it’s never been in before: new. The best missiles in the world. The best equipment in the world. The best military equipment of all. We’re building submarines — the finest. Nobody can even think about competing with what we’re building. We’re building, as you know, new submarines.

We have a new aircraft carrier coming online. It’s the largest ship in the world. It’s so large that maybe I could even land a plane on top of it, okay? But it’s a big — it’s a big one. President Gerald Ford. It’s a phenomenal — it’s a phenomenal ship.
...

I read a report today about CIA; that’s totally a false story. That’s another lie. They put out propaganda. They put out lies. I don’t think Pakistan would ever do a thing like that, right? Pakistan —

PRIME MINISTER KHAN: Definitely not.

PRESIDENT TRUMP: Pakistan never lies.

PRIME MINISTER KHAN: Definitely not.

PRESIDENT TRUMP: But Iran does, unfortunately. So let’s see what happens with Iran. We are ready for the absolute worst.
...

And, of course, they gave 150 billion dollars plus 1.8 billion in green — green, beautiful cash. That’s called many plane loads of cash. I think Pakistan would like to have some of that cash.
...

I want a couple of Pakistani reporters. I like them. I like them much better than our reporters.
...

I don’t think Pakistan respected the United States. I don’t think Pakistan respected its presidents. And I think Pakistan could have done a lot. I think Pakistan can do tremendous amount against — with respect to Afghanistan. They didn’t do it and I don’t’ blame them because they were dealing with the wrong President. Who knows? But I think Pakistan could have done — they’re helping us a lot now.

I think they could have helped us a lot in the past. But it doesn’t matter. We have a new leader; he’s doing to be a great leader of Pakistan. And we have a new leader here. Sort of new; I’m two and half years now — getting to be three years, can you believe it? You’re going to find time flies.
...

And, you know, I know President Xi. We’re working on trade deals right now. We’ll see what happens. In the meantime, they’re paying us billions and billions of dollars of tariffs, which is fine with me.
...

It should be resolved. So it — but he asked me the same, so I think there’s something. So maybe we’ll speak to him or I’ll speak to him, and we’ll see if we can do something because I’ve heard so much about Kashmir. Such a beautiful name. It’s supposed to be such a beautiful part of the world. But right now there’s just bombs all over the place. They say everywhere you go, you have bombs and it’s a terrible situation. Been going on for many years. If I can do anything to help that, let me know.

Let me give you one thing on Afghanistan, as an example. So a lot of you don’t know this, but we dropped the largest non-nuclear bomb ever built in history. We dropped it in Afghanistan. We were getting ready to make many of those bombs. This left a hole that was — it took out a lot of the tunnels and everything else. But it left a hole in the Earth that looked like the moon; it looked like a crater from the moon. It’s still there. It was — nobody has ever seen anything like it. People heard it 15 miles away. They said, “What was that?” It shook the Earth. Non-nuclear — the largest ever made, by far.
...

You know, Pakistan is a big country. It’s actually a very big country, and they have tremendous product. They make great product. They make tremendous — I’ve bought from Pakistan over the years when I was in the private sector. They make incredible product. They’re brilliant people. They’re hardworking people.

I think we’re going to have a fantastic trade relationship. I don’t mean we’ll increase it by 20 percent. I mean, I think we can quadruple it. I think it could go — I mean, literally, it sounds crazy — you could go 10 times more. You could go 20 times more. Because what we do right now is not much, and we should do a lot.
...

I’m the best thing that ever happened to Puerto Rico because we did a great job in Puerto Rico. They don’t like to give me the credit for it, but we did a great job. I have many Puerto Rican friends. I have a real understanding of Puerto Rico. I’ve had jobs in Puerto Rico.

I had — I think the most successful — I owned the Miss Universe contests and pageants, and we had them in Puerto Rico twice. And I’ll tell you, we had tremendous successes. In fact, they said literally 100 percent — this never happens — almost — I think it was close to 100 — but 100 percent of the island itself was watching. They liked those pageants.

Now, I’ve had a great relationship with Puerto Rico. I’m the best thing that ever happened to Puerto Rico.
....

https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefings-st ... l-meeting/
“The purpose of studying economics is not to acquire a set of ready-made answers to economic questions, but to learn how to avoid being deceived by economists.” ― Joan Robinson
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby seemslikeadream » Tue Jul 23, 2019 10:32 pm

Image

'Cooler filled with male genitalia' found in raid of Phoenix body-donation company


Stephanie Innes, Arizona Republic Published 9:00 a.m. MT July 19, 2019 | Updated 1:45 p.m. MT July 19, 2019

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33 plaintiffs say Biological Resource Center lied to families and treated the deceased with a lack of dignity or respect.


At least four for-profit body donation companies are still operating in Arizona. Unlike the Biological Resource Center, they are accredited. (Photo: Wikipedia Commons)

A head sewn onto a mismatched body, a bucket of limbs and a cooler filled with penises are among items found by FBI agents during a raid on a Phoenix body-donation business.

The now-shuttered, for-profit Biological Resource Center specialized in accepting the bodies of people after they had died, and in exchange offering their families free pickup of the bodies plus the cremated remains of the body parts the company did not sell.

Arizona is a regulatory-free zone for the body-parts industry. At least four body donation companies are operating in Arizona, in addition to a non-profit cryonics company that freezes people after they die with the intent of one day bringing them back to life.

An FBI special agent, during a January 2014 raid of the Biological Resource Center, stumbled on what he described as "various unsettling scenes." The agent's grisly eyewitness account of the raid was recently revealed in a civil lawsuit against the business and its owner, Stephen Gore. The case is set for trial Oct. 21 in Maricopa County Superior Court.


Thirty-three plaintiffs have sued the Biological Resource Center, saying the remains of their family members were obtained through "false statements," that body parts were being sold for profit to various middlemen, and that they were not stored, treated or disposed of with dignity or respect.

Reacting to the Biological Resource Center case, Arizona passed a law in 2017 that says body donation companies are not allowed without a state license. However, the law has not yet been implemented or enforced.

All four body donation companies known to be operating in Arizona are accredited by the American Association of Tissue Banks, which the Biological Resource Center was not.

The Phoenix company was raided after a nationwide criminal investigation.

Efforts to reach Gore, who is listed in court filings as representing himself in the civil action, were unsuccessful.

For more stories that matter, subscribe to azcentral.com.
'Frankenstein' head observed

In his declaration contained in the civil lawsuit's court file, former Phoenix FBI special agent Mark Cwynar said he "personally observed various unsettling scenes" while inside Biological Resource Center.

Many of the body parts he saw were piled on top of one another with no apparent identification to indicate what bodies they came from or to whom they belonged, he said.

In addition to a "cooler filled with male genitalia," Cwynar testified that he also saw a "large torso with the head removed and replaced with a smaller head sewn together in a 'Frankenstein' manner."

Cwynar said he saw:

Large male torsos with limbs and genitalia removed.
Buckets and coolers with various body parts, including a bucket of heads, arms and legs.
Body parts piled on top of each other throughout the facility, with no apparent identification.
Steel freezers with frozen body parts inside with no apparent identification.

Court documents included a report from two experts for the plaintiffs that referred to a 2013 request to use at least two Biological Resource Center bodies for the purpose of "plastination for education." The experts said plastination, which is a way of preserving entire human bodies, should require separate consent because the preservation is more permanent and the bodies are often publicly displayed.

In October 2015, Gore tearfully pleaded guilty to conducting an illegal enterprise after accusations that he had provided vendors with contaminated human tissue and used body parts in ways that the donors had not permitted.

In a letter to Maricopa County Superior Court Judge Warren Granville before his December 2015 sentencing, Gore wrote that he felt overwhelmed, but that he was working in an industry with "no formal regulations" to reference for guidance.


In 2016, HB 2307, which requires regulation of the body donation industry, was signed into law. The bill was revised in 2017 but never implemented. Arizona Republic

"I could have been more open about the process of donation on the brochure we put in public view," Gore wrote. "When deciding which donors could be eligible to donate, I should have hired a medical director rather than relying on medical knowledge from books or the internet."

Research by plaintiffs' lawyers says Gore's highest level of education was high school, and that he did not have any licenses or certifications applicable to body donation program operations.

MORE: 5 things you need to know before donating your body to science

Torso with head: $2,400

The Biological Resource Center was a for-profit body donation company that accepted donations of bodies after people died. The company gave donors and their families free transportation services to pick up the body, plus free cremation.

One of the problems is that some families thought that a body "donation" meant their loved ones' bodies were being given to a charity to help with disease research. Some mistakenly thought the Biological Resource Center would be donating their loved ones' organs, not knowing that organ donation and body donation are not the same thing.

Not all were aware the Biological Resource Center often dismembered and sold various body parts.

A 2013 price list that is part of the court file indicates sale prices for body parts:

Whole body with no shoulders or head: $2,900.
Torso with head: $2,400.
Whole spine: $950.
Whole leg: $1,100.
Whole foot: $450.
Knee: $375.
Pelvis: $400.
https://www.azcentral.com/story/news/lo ... 720254001/
Mazars and Deutsche Bank could have ended this nightmare before it started.
They could still get him out of office.
But instead, they want mass death.
Don’t forget that.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby seemslikeadream » Tue Jul 30, 2019 9:47 am

Texas man checks missile launcher in luggage, still caught his flight, TSA says
https://www.usatoday.com/story/travel/n ... 864580001/
Mazars and Deutsche Bank could have ended this nightmare before it started.
They could still get him out of office.
But instead, they want mass death.
Don’t forget that.
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Re: Stories that should come from The Onion but don't

Postby PufPuf93 » Thu Aug 01, 2019 11:34 pm

5 police officers face punishment for arresting Stormy Daniels at strip club

Five Ohio police officers, including a commander, a lieutenant, a sergeant and two arresting officers, have been departmentally charged in connection with the arrest of porn star Stormy Daniels and two other women at a Columbus strip club last year.

Daniels -- whose real name is Stephanie Clifford – was arrested by vice unit officers at the Sirens Gentleman’s Club on July 11, 2018, along with fellow strippers Miranda Panda and Brittany Walters, on suspicion of sexually touching a patron while on stage, police said at the time.

(MORE: Michael Avenatti pleads not guilty to charges of stealing nearly $300K from adult film actress Stormy Daniels)


The three women were charged with inappropriately touching and inappropriate acts with customers, some of whom were undercover Columbus police officers.

However, the criminal charges were dropped not long after the arrests when an internal investigation of more than 11,000 emails and over 30 hours of video determined that they were improperly arrested, according to Columbus ABC affiliate WSYX.

Police Chief Tom Quinlan said he made the decision to departmentally charge the five officers because they violated the Columbus Division of Police rules of conduct.

"From initially reviewing the facts surrounding Stormy's arrest, it was evident she was clearly targeted for a high profile arrest here,"
Chase Mallory, an attorney for Stormy Daniels, told WSYX. "So we are not surprised at all. I am surprised it took this long to seek discipline. But, nonetheless, we are happy that they are."

more at: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/5-pol ... li=BBnbcA1
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