Oi oi oi!
You know what dear fellow humane beings...
Ill share with you a great vegan recipe for "meatfree meat"

One warning though - if youre allergic to wheat gluten, this is a hell no for you!
Seitan recipe, possible to vary the exact mixture...The best in my opinion is a 4:1:1 mix of gluten flour, hemp flour and chick pea flour. That way the texture is best, and the seitan has all necessary proteins. Wheat alone lacks some, but hemp flour has the perfect balance of amino acids for humans, and chick pea flour adds flavour and some amino acids to the mix.
You can buy gluten flour in most organic shoppes (like hemp flour and chick pea - I try to buy my hemp seed from local farmers when possible). Or you can make it yourself by washing out all carbohydrates from normal wheat flour, but thats a pain, and I wont go into it now
The seitan dough:
4 dl of gluten flour
1 dl gram flour = chick pea flour
1 dl of hemp flour (can be soy flour too - I dont like using soy too much)
1/2 teaspoon of powdered ginger
1/2 teaspoon of salt
1 large spoon of soy sauce (I like to add also some HP Sauce - a british vegan table sauce)
1 large spoon of olive or rapeseed oil
3 dl water
The boiling water mixture:
1/3 dl balsam vinegar
1/3 dl soy sauce
1/3 dl dark sugar syrup
2 vegetable broth cubes (if thats the right english word

)
Add water to these ingredients so you have enough for boiling the seitan pieces, explained later
Marinade:
1 large spoon of soy sauce
1 large spoon of olive / rapeseed oil
1 teaspoon of dried thyme
1/3 dl of water
Prepare the seitan dough. Mix the dry ingredients. Mix the wet ones in another bowl. Make a small pit in the middle of the flour, and slowly add the liquids while kneading the dough with your hands. Knead at least 5 mins - the longer and smoother you knead it, the better the texture will be.
Cut the dough into small pieces - about the size of your thumbs end (one can also make thin slices - steaks). Watch out for the pieces sticking together - dont pile em on top of each other!
Now prepare the boiling mixture with the spices, and when the water is boiling, drop the seitan pieces in one by one. Mix a little so they dont stick to the pot or each other - when theyve been in a couple mins they wont stick anymore. Boil for 20 minutes. Drain well. When all pieces have cooled, squeeze as much liquid out as you can.
Now put the pieces in the marinade you prepared - some tight closable container is best. Put them in a cool place and let be for couple hours.
Now you can use them just like you would use meat. You can grill em, fry em on a pan and use in woks, or make steaks to use in hamburgers. This is the veritable vegan meat - its got more protein than actual meat

And its cheap and easy to make. You can go wild with the spice experimentation - if you love chili, hell, throw a lot in!
And one last note: If you like sublimely divine sausages...Make the dough as above, but put in more spices. Then heat up your oven, roll the seitan into longish sausagish rolls, and roll some tin foil (
I know you all got plenty of that!) around it, tightly! At least 2 layers, then wrap the ends tight too. The oven should be at 190 Celsius or so, and bake these tinfoilwrapped vegan sausages there for 40 mins or so. With little experimentation you can make a perfect salami replacement for pizzas etc!
Bon appetit!